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RECOVERY

My family member or elderly parent was scammed — how do I help them?

Finding out that someone you care about has been scammed can be distressing. The most important things right now are to act quickly on the practical steps, and to respond with support rather than blame — both are essential for recovery.

In an active crisis?

  • Call your bank
  • Call the platform (Amazon, PayPal, MobilePay, etc.)
  • Call local police

Start with support, not blame

Scams are designed by professionals to deceive people of all ages and backgrounds. Your family member is not foolish or careless — they were targeted by someone whose full-time job is to manipulate people. Shame and embarrassment are common reactions, and they can prevent people from reporting the scam or accepting help.

Before you take any practical steps, let them know that this is not their fault, that it happens to many people, and that you are there to help — not to judge. This matters both for their wellbeing and because shame can cause people to hide the full extent of what happened, which makes recovery harder.

Step 1 — Contact the bank immediately

Do this now: If money was transferred, call the bank's fraud line immediately. The sooner you call, the better the chance of stopping or recalling the payment. If your relative is able to make the call themselves, support them — if not, you may need to call on their behalf (have their account details ready). See the contact bank page for full steps.

If the scammer still has access to their device or accounts, help them change passwords and log out of all sessions before the bank call if possible — but do not delay the bank call to do this.

Step 2 — Secure their accounts and devices

Do this now: Help them change the passwords for their email and online banking accounts. If the scammer had remote access to their device, the device should be checked for any software that was installed — see the remote access scam page for full steps. Enable two-factor authentication on their email and banking apps if not already active.

Important: If your relative gave the scammer their banking login details, Social Security number (US), National Insurance number (UK), or CPR number (Denmark), treat those accounts as compromised and act accordingly — see the identity theft page for steps.

Step 3 — Report the scam

Help your relative report the scam to the authorities. You can do this on their behalf if needed. A police report or official fraud report may be required by the bank to process a claim, and it creates a record that may support future action.

Step 4 — Support them through the aftermath

Being scammed can cause significant emotional distress — shame, self-blame, anxiety, and in some cases depression. This is especially common when the scam involved a relationship (such as a romance scam) or a large financial loss. Check in with your relative regularly and encourage them to talk about what happened.

Support resources: In the US, the AARP Fraud Watch Network helpline (877-908-3360) offers free support to scam victims and their families — this number is published on aarp.org and is available to people of all ages. In the UK, Victim Support (victimsupport.org.uk) provides free, confidential help. In Australia, IDCARE (idcare.org) supports victims of identity and financial crime.

When to involve the police for safety reasons

In most cases, reporting to Action Fraud, the FTC, or politi.dk is sufficient. However, contact the local police directly if:

  • The scammer is threatening your relative or has made contact in person
  • Your relative is being pressured to continue sending money and is in distress
  • You are concerned about your relative's safety or mental health

You've taken the right steps: You have acted quickly, supported your relative without blame, contacted the bank, and reported the scam. That is exactly the right response. This is not their fault — and it is not yours either.

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This page was last reviewed: June 27, 2026.
Recovery pages are drafted with AI assistance, then reviewed line-by-line by the editor, sourced against official reporting authorities, and tested for tone and clarity before publication.